So many inner-voices show up to tackle the mundane and the life-changing; and they don’t always agree.
I don’t consider myself superstitious. Until I am. Then I do various things to avoid jinxing myself: knock on wood; keep umbrellas closed indoors; sidestep walking beneath a ladder.
I also, on the first of a month, start the day off with the words “Rapid Rabbit.”
Talking with my sister today, she reminded me that tomorrow is “Rabbit Rabbit” day.
“Wait, did you say Rabid Rabbit?” I asked her.
It wasn’t just an avocado. It was an instant of attentiveness, of being awake to a moment in life I usually sleep through. Were I not blogging, I likely would’ve slept through that moment. Instead, I experienced avocado-man with an awareness that saw his small act as something bigger.
As if in slo-mo, I fully took it in.
That’s been a wonderfully, unexpected benefit of blogging.
Photo source: coyot on Pixabay
A fellow ran down the sidewalk from Whole Foods, an avocado in his hand. I was in line at a sidewalk sandwich spot off our town square. Avocado-man popped behind the sandwich counter, cut the fruit open, sliced it, and laid it perfectly onto a partially-made sandwich, which he handed to the man in front of me.
Wow, I thought. What a great customer experience.
Can you imagine! I picture him telling his friends. The guy ran over to Whole Foods to get an avocado. For my sandwich!
And his friends would shake their heads in disbelief.
As my friends shake their heads in disbelief when I tell them how things went awry during my birthday outing. The birthday without clean coffee cups, bananas or bread. And with no one going out of their way to deliver any of them for me.
That customer and I; we each had stories to tell.
Photo source: ponce_photography on Pixabay
I wasn’t sure if avocados were fruits or veggies; they’re a fruit. Here’s the scoop from the California Avocado Commission.
I had 1,000 pieces to choose from.
I would put my puzzle together. I would include straight border edges.
If I couldn’t do it following instructions, I could do it my way. It didn’t matter if all 1,000 pieces were there. I was only going to use thirty-one of them. I’d make them fit.
Sometimes you have to bend rules; think outside the box; stretch boundaries; break clichés.
Sometimes you have to own the puzzle.
I owned it.
Photo source: Walk the Goats
Bubba said this on our walk today. It turns out it wasn’t a Bubba-ism. But it could have been.
Photo Source: AdobeSpark
1,000 pieces. That’s what the puzzle box said. I bought it. I’d try this puzzle thing.
Last time I was around a puzzle was 2-years ago. I was at a birthday party and the puzzle was 2/3rd complete. The remaining pieces were nicely laid out, face up. Several folks were standing over the puzzle, chatting, while scanning and trying to fit pieces in. I hit 3-clean picks in a row: snap, snap, snap. It was satisfying. “I’m a natural at this,” I thought.
I figured I’d buy a puzzle and try it at home. Lots of folks like puzzles. Maybe I’m one of them.
A thousand-piece puzzle is not a good place to start, if you aren’t sure you love puzzles.
An obsession with gold; a craving for it.
Midas—a man of great wealth—loved his daughter, his rose garden, and gold. Certain that more gold would bring more happiness, he was granted his wish that everything he touched would turn to gold. He made a critical miscalculation however: how would it play out at meal time? Or when he hugged his daughter?
He got his wish. And launched his nightmare.
Fast forward to today. To a world filled with people of great wealth; who love their children. And who, based on the current college admissions scandal, have twisted ideas about what’s important in life.
We’ve created a world where a diploma—issued in limited quantities by elite, Ivy League colleges—is today’s contemporary gold.
This golden diploma is obsessed over. Parents want their children to have it, convinced it will guarantee success; and success will, what, breed happiness?
At least King Midas earned his golden wish by doing a kindness for the servant of a god. He may have made a bad choice in how he spent his wish, but at least he didn’t bribe his way to it.
Not so with today’s parents of wealth who decided to buy their kids’ entrance into elite universities and give them a chance to get that coveted golden diploma. Those parents chose to cheat the system through bribery and lies. I wonder if they planned to continue the deceit and buy good grades for their kids after they got admitted.
The thing is, lies are like the golden touch. They both suggest you’ll get what you want. Midas would get his beloved gold. Parents would get their children into sought-after colleges.
But in the end, the golden touch and lies both destroy; they destroy the person employing them, and their loved ones.
Photo source: 3602209 on Pixabay
“Look!” I said to Bubba. “It’s spring! The rosemary bush is covered with bees, busy gathering pollen. Look at them all.”
Bubba glanced up. “You’re right, there are a bunch of bees.”
“Just think,” I continued. “All those lovely girl bees; working away. Meanwhile, the guys are back at the hive, smoking cigars, hoping they get lucky and get to f*ck the Queen. And then die.”
Photo source: Walk the Goats
(P.S. I know that’s not rosemary; it’s an artichoke flower.)
Bubba and I will be several blocks from home when one of us turns to the other and asks, “did you lock the door?”
The question triggers doubt. The doubt clings. When that question gets asked, we’ve learned to turn around, go home and check. Then we can go forward, unencumbered by worry.
Locking the door is an automatic habit. We do it absently. Most of the time. Except for those times we forget.
Because we occasionally do forget, our question—did you lock the door—compels us to return home.
With all our mindfulness exercises, we kept thinking there must be some way to help us remember if we locked the door.
There is.
It’s a professionally-approved system, elegant in its simplicity.
As I insert my key in the lock—we live in a dumb house and are damn proud of it—I say, out loud as I turn the key, “I locked the door.”
Sometimes I say it twice, always out loud.
If Bubba is there, he says it back, “you locked the door.”
It’s very low-tech. No app required. Short. Concise. Engages the brain in actively noting the task as it’s being done.
To help me not view it as a sign I’m getting older, I imagine it’s like a pilot going through their pre-flight checklist. I don’t care how many hours they’ve flown, I want them verbally saying each item on the list as they do it.
If it’s good enough for them flying a plane, it’s good enough for our home security system.
Photo source: PhotoMIX-Company on Pixabay
Am I creative? Am I willing to fail?
As I face these questions, I squirm.
I feel like a caterpillar in a silk cocoon, not quite sure where I am in my evolution, but feeling as if some transition is unfolding, out-of-sight.
What transition, I’m not sure. Nor why.
Being unsure, I feel afraid, uncertain, confused.
With a tinge of hopeful anticipation.
Given the nature of life, sh*t happened this past year. The same month I started blogging, mom almost died. She didn’t, not then, but 6-months later cancer got her. My blog turned out to be an unexpected blessing; a place I could try and make sense of mom’s last months. Who would’ve known when I launched WTG it would give me a place to unpack stuff, and get support from fellow bloggers?
At this time last year, I was still working, self-employed. After mom’s first hospital scare, I scaled back my hours to be available. It allowed several trips east to help navigate mom’s health issues. After her death, I called it quits, claiming sabbatical, but wondering if I’ll ever go back to seeing clients. I was ready to stop; this was an easy nudge.
Given the time I’ve spent helping dad with things—some of which mom used to handle—I’m grateful I’m not also juggling a full-time job. Between mom’s-post-death stuff, Board duties, Bubba-relationship, and blogging, my days are filled. As some commitments fade away, I’ll see what new interests reveal themselves. Maybe National Novel Writing Month?
Not working is intriguing.
Friends thinking about retiring fear they won’t know what to do with their days.
Friends who’ve retired say they’re always busy, although half-the-time they admit they can’t figure out what they did all day. They share a persistent wondering: “how’d I used to work full-time, raise kids, do the shopping, run errands, make meals, clean the house and occasionally have fun?”
Sabbatical is my version of not working; certainly of being busy while not getting paid. My experience throws me solidly in the how’d I used to manage all that stuff camp.
I’m getting a taste of not working; feeling a nudge toward retirement. I like it.
How about you? If you’re retired (or nearing retirement) or on sabbatical, what inner voices chirp away in your head? Are you embracing or resisting it? Scared by or excited by it?
And if you’re fully immersed in it, what fills your days?
Photo source: geralt on Pixabay
I love this chair. Lots of friends shared their memories of similar chairs when they were growing up. I told dad I thought the red chair would look great against snow. When enough fresh powder lightly blanketed it, he obliged and took pictures for me. It’s beautiful in any season. May it remind you of a peaceful place, time, moment.
Photos: Walk the Goats’ Dad
I don’t know if blogging for one year triggers a birthday celebration, an anniversary or both. I’m going with birthday, because while I hitched myself to WordPress in 2017, it wasn’t until March 1, 2018 that I launched Walk the Goats, and committed to writing regularly. Here I am; one year in, plugging away.
Thanks to those who joined me on the outset of this journey. To those who found me more recently, welcome. It seemed easier to meet fellow bloggers when the WordPress Community Pool existed. Or maybe I just need a gentle push to engage with others more.
So, in honor of this wonderful blogging community and my one-year-blogging birthday, I’ve got an ask. Send me some great reads. Link me to a favorite blog post. Whether it’s your own or a fellow blogger—or both!—doesn’t matter. I’ll read, and I’ll comment.
Help plug me in to others. Help me laugh, learn, ponder, mull and delight in the wit and wisdom of those you read. It’ll be an awesome blogging-birthday-gift. Serve it up in the comments below.
If you simply want to wish me a happy blogging-birthday, I’ll take it. Thanks, and here’s to continued blogging success!
Photo source: Clker-Free-Vector-Images on Pixabay
I have odd things stashed in places that aren’t logical, but I know where they are.
Walk the Goats 